Cancer Discussions, Cancer Support and Community Connection Forum - November 8th, 2009 - 8 Comments
How do you give hope to a cancer patient?
I have a family member whose been diagnosed with cancer and not only that we both lost our grandma this past summer. She wont tell no one except only her family… She doesn’t want pity from people and yeah, she is most of the strongest and bravest person I’ve ever known.
Since she is not looking for a pity party I would continue to be there for her. I would let her know that you realize that it gets tiring after of while when people keep asking you how do you feel and what’s going on with your condition. Let her know your there when she wants to talk about it but you are not going to cons tally bring it up. Sometimes it is not what we say but how we treat a person. Actions speak louder then words.
Tell her to be patient and to stay strong. Reassure her that everything will be alright. Dont show her pitty and try to keep her laughing. Make a joke of everything!!!!!
Listen to the Exhortation of the Dawn!
Look to this Day!
For it is Life, the very Life of Life.
In its brief course lie all the
Verities and Realities of your Existence.
The Bliss of Growth,
The Glory of Action,
The Splendor of Beauty;
For Yesterday is but a Dream,
And To-morrow is only a Vision;
But To-day well lived makes
Every Yesterday a Dream of Happiness,
And every Tomorrow a Vision of Hope.
Look well therefore to this Day!
just tell her to keep her head up and NEVER stop trying to fight it…reassure her that she’s needed and listen to everything she says…my mother got diagnosed with breast cancer and lived with it for about 9 years before she passed away…she was the strongest woman i ever knew and shes greatly missed….just dont lose faith and hope
I lost my son to cancer three years ago and he was the most bravest person that I knew, just be there and listen to her and never stop hoping, God has a plan and we just don’t know it, I was very angry that my son died but he is safe and has no more chemo, and the cancer is gone he got peace and they are stronger than we who love them, so be strong and make the very best of your time together, Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven, this will humble you in life and never take life for granted, don’t waste time enjoy and travel with her and see things and go places that you both said you wanted to go just do this the memories will be worth it. Write me back I wish you and her family the very best, From a Mother who cares and understands. Peace and Blessings to the Family!!!!!
DO things with her that wont make her think about her being sick. Be supportive and just pray. Plan a special day to get her cheers up and put a smile on her face.
You know God can cure all.
Contrary to popular believe, you can’t give other people the feelings you want them to have.
She doesn’t want to tell people other than her family, because she doesn’t want to discuss it, or hear all the stupid and even rude things people will say.
You don’t say what the situation is, for instance, whether she’s getting treatment, what her chances are for long-term survival, or even why you feel she needs hope.
What you can do is be there for her. When she wants to talk about it, listen. When she doesn’t, don’t bother her.
Otherwise, treat her normallly.
If she’s getting debilitating treatment, offer specific help.
If it’s interfering with her doing her normal stuff, ditto.
Sympathy and concern are not the same as the drippy forms of pity.
If she understands that distinction, then you can offer sympathy and show concern.
For more specific advice, try another question, but explain her situation in more detail.
If you try to offer help, and she spurns it as pity, try pointing out to her that family helps when one has the need for help, and ask whether she would offer to help you if you needed it.